24 February, 2011

professing sweet love

This is a series of love.
~ For I don’t hate-love-story!

I decided to sit near the window, so that I could get a better view. Well it was only an excuse and everyone knew about it; that I actually sat beside him in the class and he was sitting near the window.
While he was writing, I swiftly took away his pencil, to a bit annoy him!

“What?” He asked getting a bit annoyed.

“muhhaa...giving a wink” I expressed shamelessly!


O yeah I can do that..!!
Expect anything from our generation guys..!
We have this common consent that we are liberal and have this freedom to choose whatever we wished to dream and also accept the consequences willingly of our proposed naughty thoughts. That is how I celebrate my freedom of expression!

But the matter of fact is I'm like a little child with him and simply unembarrassed at any silliest of moments!

“It will take only a step, for you to get little more close to me but it will take same one step for me to cross all the limitations!” I thought.

..it took just a realisation to accept him as a vital part
of my
life...
Indeed I understood finally what being in love is.
I was suddenly all over. With that extra vibe and zest in life to let do anything which was a chance or a serious risk. Since I knew in my mind and acknowledge the fact that I was being loved and supported.

They say it takes like a lifetime to actually find someone who would genuinely love you. But for me it was only about a realisation when I hopelessly accepted him to be a part of my life. Perhaps a part of my life that was the most vital and sweetest one, I guess!

~ Early winters last year when after a long time really long time...I got in touch with him...I hardly knew how things would shape but I wanted to replicate the patterns of happiness and friendship we used to have in our relationship, long back!

It was cold outside yet the thoughts of his made me warm inside. A fog that covered the whole world, the same mist captured my heart and confined from sinking. I knew from the beginning that it will be a long story. And I wanted it to last too with a twist of love...which puts indeed everything so straight touching the cords of heart.

I knew I was supposed to take the level up with the kind of conversation we were trying to put yet it dint matter as I was very determined even in the first line when I said to him,

“Come on call me now!”

As soon as we were brought together by the social network to the real visible one to one chat, we decided to speak which just sparked. I was dominating and very aggressive with my words. And he confused trying to talk liberally but with a hesitation of the strange year’s gap and no conversation link up.

..sometimes we act so silly only in an attempt to look smart in the basic moments
of ourlife...
I know, most of the time we act so stupidly...yet at the fundamental moments in life. Especially when we take so much of pain to be ourselves and to know the other person who is definitely the dearest one.

We basically don’t want to hurt them.
We definitely don’t want them to leave us, now when we have met again by destiny. Okay now how come destiny took all the credits, I wonder. I made those silly effort to get in touch back and fate is believed to play the fair game...this ofcourse annoys me a bit!

“How is life?” he asked
(Knowing I was fine and leading a good life...yet it is just a formal may to start a conversation and should be appreciated in every way...)

“I’m fine, how is your life!” I said
(I always knew he would lead a good life since he was good person at heart, I perhaps also knew he have his own life and huge changes for his betterment yet I wanted to ask and know actually if he missed me sometime some day by chance at least...)

“Life is good!” he said with strength of mind!
And I always appreciated his fortitude of believing in things.

“Did you miss me tell me the truth...” I said with conviction.
(No more beating behind the bushes, I wanted to talk business no matter what the consequence is. He could get annoyed and call of the talk off or can get honest and speak his heart! Choice he has to make today or never.)

We often make weird walls against our loved ones...not because we don’t want them to be near to us yet we think the wall will secure them and they might never leave us. A kind of insane way to believe, indeed!

I made the same kind of wall. And I could not latter when I wanted to, could not break the wall but I had to take a step up...climb and cross all the hurdles...perhaps which were created by me only.

..sometimes we need to cross all the hurdles
take a step up only to taste the sweet thing...
Breaking walls would go against our intense consideration I had for many years. But when we are in love we do something that is complete opposite of  what we think and climbing a wall to cross was like not going against our belief but actually going against our strong ‘Value System’.

They see it as a blunder but I call it the sweetest thing I did for myself, profess _ I'M in love!


“I missed you”, he said with an urge.
(I could feel the pain and agony in his words yet I wanted him to speak more not because I want to hear about myself but want to know if he thinks of me, is he sure of his own thoughts!)

“A long pause....!!!”
(A pause that felt like crossing bridges of all the years and seasons that passed. It felt as a time-machine moving back in the pappy-love era yet coming forth with a realisation of present!)

“I missed you too” I replied after a long pause...
..yet with same passion and keenness to talk more.

SO here goes the shining ball of the party!!

Where I not just had a conversation, me saying - him hearing but just few words...it created a long lasting relationship. Something which was lacking for years, something which was subconsciously in our mind but since there were no stars playing there game we choose our own decisions to lead without being with together.

..my prayers are answered whenever I hear words pouring
for me...
We had nothing to regret we were happy in our own way...at least that what we said and meant then. Yet human nature is such that one always craves for more, this time I wanted him to say more and I wanted me to do more!
Indeed I have to be sure of what I want in life since it’s a pious moment where if I ask for something else valuable I would get that, I knew it.
It’s like my consistent prayers are being answered, as I hear his words pouring for me. Prayers when with all my heart only wished good for him, never begged for anything selfish means but believing at heart-core with a hope that I will get when the time is right for me and what I owe will be mine, some decent day!

“Keep in touch with me!” we concluded our talks!

All we wanted and wished was sharing our words, our little humble world and our stories and perhaps share our mind!
Indeed it was not about the physical thing. Yet with all that good positive philosophy, we cannot ignore the fact we wanted to meet, touch, feel and share the most adoring kiss and share the warmest hug with the one we love so much! Ahhh...! Right now kisses are only stolen breaths!

“Do u still miss me....I see no Hiccups!” I teasingly often said to him.

But now when we are together and going really strong surprisingly, we still choose and respect our individual life yet have 'our little world of me and you' as the back-up to fight all the odds in life.

Seriously, being loved and to be in love is the best feeling in life. Especially when we know there is nothing that can go wrong or against us! By default it just comes being fearless and face the world and standing beside each other unconditionally.

Loving gives a courage as a validate reason of having the integrity to make correct choices when other things might appear easier and intimidating.

I say this because my fear of unknown disappears when I’m with him.
It’s when I’m a leading man in his life..I like the way being bold strong aggressive in approach!!

You call me ‘mini Hitler’, I won’t mind at all, my sweet love!

I like taking responsibility when I see he just take the whole weird world off my shoulders with a sweet smile. His cutest way of making me feel special just takes me to different planet where I have no fear and I get true to myself. Perhaps I’m true to myself when I’m with him.

...my
whole
world
is true
when I'M withyou..
I still have a lot to share with him. All those things which happened when he was around but only in mind and thoughts...still to tell a lot! I will never say that he was not around since he was always there...wishing good for me even if it was from a distance.

I don’t claim to be the best but I’m trying to be good, which itself is a huge task. I might be smart but I’m not mean but trying to a more meaningful in life, trying to discover something better yet beautiful in me!

“You look different today...or it just that I noticed something new!” 
He cracked one day with a slight sweet curve on his perfect lips.

I think, I do good and think all good when he is around.
And even when he is not physically around I hear his voice, which echo in mind all the time. Yet sometimes thought passes, is being so much blindfolded faith okay, yet I know when I doubt, its only for myself not on him.
He is still the most influential person of my life and I choose to go one more spin on one toe at his tune anytime for him!

“I was always that nice (trying to be generous)and beautiful (trying to be mean too same time)! 
You never noticed, perhaps! ” I said overruling the boundary!

I don’t understand....when we LOVE someone...why are we thinking of boundaries and limitations so much...why can’t we just love! Why just we can’t be together cherishing past and celebrating the present! Why can’t we just be you and me for miles where we have a little good time!
Love definitely brings the best in you forward. I see that every time.

I want to run anytime towards him and give a tight hug. Return to my childhood with him and play those silly games, cheat and win, winning yet let him win sometimes, fly kites, cycle, go gym together, make breakfast in kitchen, do everything that is enough of pleasure and joy before I grew "old" and miss the game. I want us to be able to chase one another around the room, have a good pillow fights, and wrestle, cuddle. I want us to tease one another even if that means I'll shed tears getting irritated, I want to share silly jokes, and dilute the rough edge of life, the seriousness and stress of a working day with the magical spell of humor and a charming smile to treasure each day!

“I have never been loved and appreciated so much...Don’t pamper me so much...you will spoil me like you did to kids! ” he said in a serious tone that day.

I wonder how my love will spoil you for I will love you forever with no conditions applied.
It’s not the way that I deserve you but what I think and believe that I perhaps owe you!!
And when the feeling of owing or something comes, one just can’t let it go and losing is something you can’t even think of.

..mutual magic
in every move
I see miracle
when i'm inlove...
Okay we dint try as usual couple do...meet and hang around. We never had a chance to know each other ever. But life has something else planned.
I think we need not make effort to know each other as we have accepted as we are and appreciate that in every little way. But we shared the same sentiments for each other and things and also had kind of same priorities in life to fulfill.
There is definitely something celestial goes when we are together or thinking of each other. There is a mutual magic and I feel miracle in every move and I mean that with all of my heart!

“You are getting old. You should take care in winters...are you or you need a good dose again!” 
I said owing responsibility.

~ Time just flies.

Sometimes fussing and fighting on silly stops but being forever in love was the part to understand each other better. We saw each other growing old, liking the wrinkles and probably disliking the grey hair.
Though, I feel more healthier and happier being in love. 
But how amazing is love, it never grows old and probably every time brings back you youth in the passion.

..a cute clue
that changes
life for
ever is sweetlove...
I will never forget the sweet time we had then. Again thinking it brings the same smile and happiness. Accepting and embracing are my constant companions while I’m still in love.

I still feel that cottage, the smell if the bamboo wall, the flame warming souls; long walk together forever into the crimson sunset under the maple shade. It’s like a cool wave of the breeze every time I think.

The best thing I learnt being in love is to never give up and perhaps never loses faith.

"Do you still love me?" Still every time I like to ask him.
"I Love You!" he said convincingly!
Okay I ask not because I have any kind of doubt or have lack of trust but honestly, every time I ask, and every time he say "I Love You!"...my heart just jumps with joy!

The kind of conviction every time he show to prove that he still loves me the same way he used to when we first met, is so amazing to watch on his face reflecting care and concern. Hence, I don't mind even if he gets annoyed of repeatedly asking same thing but its just that I Love to hear, feeling so refreshed every time...perhaps who doesn't love to be loved genuinely generously!

And indeed,when I'm loved...I need to be told that I'm loved and showed in every little gesture and more that you missed me and love me the most! A silent-sweet-love perhaps wont please or impress that much this brat princess!!

Love always made me hopeful and helped me to endure through every circumstance. Indeed, life has its own way to give you message and have its own plans for you and not in high-sounding words but in more of silence the life professes the love of your life.

I’m so glad that we were able to crack the code and read that clue which completely changed my life!

"That’s how the sweet thing is and my sweetheart is!"
She concluded with a husky tone, some silence and a sacred tear passing through her cheek.


There was a stunned silence, followed by soft giggling, then loud giggling and finally outright laughter. Kids could not stop smiling as she stopped telling the love-story of her life!
They think their gorgeous grandmother did not probably do much insane in her youth to her love like today’s youth does yet she did a lot to preserve and still serve her lover the best...with sweet words and that’s more killing!
~ However one cannot ignore other side of the story that old yet gorgeous grandmother was still sweet princess at her heart, professing her perfect sweet love!

Note: the picture above belongs to my very close friends. I want to heartily thank for their contribution and immense love they share with me.
My Blog post selected~The post "Professing Sweet Love" has been selected by Blogadda as one of the Spicy Saturday pick. Click the image to read the info and Click here for reading the post.
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18 February, 2011

A white Cup of Coffee

The wonderful picture attached below is captured by my very dear friend, "Parker".

Ones again a fascination with a coffee and a thought provoked my head with a superb realization.
As always a beautiful day...went to the CCD(Cafe Coffee day) to enjoy my lovable aromatic cappuccino a kind of coffee.
This CCD had its best location as it was almost in the heart of the market area...and I choose to sit outside under the umbrella to feel the air and bit of sunlight around. Basically enjoying the heat and dust of India!

My coffee was on the table and every time I looked my cup of coffee I wished if my cup was white colour it would have stood out in the colourful background. Than thought the white colour would actually look more hygienic and give more purity kind of feeling...which brought amazing brightness in thoughts while sipping the coffee.

But alas...my cup of coffee was actually of black colour with some weird print...which totally distracted me and my brewing thoughts.
In fact, I stared my silly black cup so badly as if I could even break that with my eying power, I thought.

Soon I started thinking that, I like more of glasses/crystal which is transparent in looks...tall without handle to hold...and while we hold them in hands...they warm up our palms with a soothing effect.

I wondered more stupid as the thought passed through...how about drinking a coffee in a wine glass with a tall steep bowl on top and long stem to hold elegantly....perhaps...not that appropriate for coffee...yet could I actually try drinking in it!!

Also I thought how the earthenware glasses gave so wonderful flavour to the tea we find mostly at our railway stations or bus-stands. What if we drink coffee in that...will that be a different experience!

Or drink coffee in a cheap plastic cup and be proud to the fact that the cup would have been recycled and I’m supporting a great green revolution.

And finally I remembered...when I was in college messy canteen, I ones even enjoyed my coffee in a cup which had a tiny creek on the edge of the rim of it.

...I wish 
I had
a white cup to sip my
lovely
coffee..
But whatever it is or it was or it could be...I was just not satisfied with my odd looking black cup of coffee and constantly over again and again the same thought kept repeating... “Wish I had a White Cup to sip my lovely coffee!”

The options of glasses were many from truly expensive to some very cheap, some exquisite and some absolutely dull plain looking. And I know no matter what, I would choose the best and most beautiful cup for me may be the most expensive one over the cheap plain looking cup and indeed this thought would resemble with everyone’s desire.

The matter of fact is everyone wants to have the best for one self. And I think there is nothing wrong in that when one is actually granted with choices to make which serve you the best.

...my conversation with my coffee was hindered
by a
sillycup...
Though, my conversation with my coffee was hindered by this silly cup.
I looked around and found few lucky one, other coffee lover enjoying their coffee in White Cup that I secretly desired for. Eyeing their cups made me a bit heartbreaking.

And that was truly strange for me as I never thought this would affect me so much and I in the longing of having the best cup, in a process would forget to enjoy my favourite coffee and my that sweet little time that I take out from the hustle bustle of life to enjoy my time where I can be with me sipping the coffee.

And with a flash suddenly I had this realisation that the cup did not add any quality or extra flavour to my coffee.

And certainly I initially ordered to have a coffee and not thought about the cup. 
Yet now when I have a coffee I’m ignoring to enjoy that aroma and I’m thinking more of the cup, its shape and colour than about the coffee.

And perhaps if we apply on life same way...
~ Life is a Coffee!
~ The job, the position we posses, the wealth we earn, the society, the status, the whole and all little thing we do in life for betterment which are important and think they are as valuable to cherish are the Cups.
Yet we stood holding our special cups in pride...which are nothing else than those just non-living tools to hold the contents called the life. Perhaps, sometimes it’s so difficult to accept the fact that the cup be it white or black shall not define what we are or can change the quality of life we are living or heading and aspiring to.

To enjoy the coffee we need to make richer with chocolate, cream, sugar or other stuff. A rich looking expensive cup wouldn't help much to enhance the flavour.
...the sweet little things in life 
are
well settled and untouched by our ignorance to see 
the little joys in
little gulps
and
tiny hiccups..

Would my friends talk to me if I have a better house, or would my family love me more if I had a car or would she/he love me more if I have more money!!

The simple true answer is 'NO'!

Indeed none of them or for the matter of fact never 'WE' decide to talk or build relationship with anyone for what one posses as luxurious richness but the true people will love you for the respect you have earned and appreciate you for more the grace you carry in your attitude and words you say or the thoughts you reflect.

We live and excel due to our own abilities and capabilities, applying with grace.

~ Sometimes we concentrate so hard only on the cup and type of cups to posses that we constantly fail to recognise to reflect the coffee, the wonderful sweet life which we are blessed and gifted with.

~ A coffee with little sugar granules settled at the bottom of the cup...possibly the little sweet things and cute moments of life settled untouched at the bottom...which still needs to be stirred and realized to enjoy.

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They don’t have the best or the most expensive cups to show. Yet they have the coffee perhaps the best one to relish. They are just making the best of everything they have.

And well goes the quote:
"I have measured out my life with coffee spoons." ~T.S. Eliot
I here ask you...
"Have you started enjoying your coffee at the core or you are still staring at the silly cup, like I did before!!"
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13 February, 2011

to be loved - Happy Valentines Day

>>This beautiful picture is captured
by my very dear friend 'Parker'.

Who does not like that cute wink
Who does not like that little glance!
Who does not like to take a chance!
A little assist in little things..
A little touch and a little blink!
Many small talks yet long conversation
Blankly staring at dreamy eyes...!
Who does not like to listen and speak precise!

Who does not like the rush in blood!
That short of breaths
That high heart beats...
And short of words
That nervy sweat
That friend’s sweet tease
Those unconfirmed up-links
Perhaps those weak knees!

Who does not like the fluttering of eyes!
That blush on face
Those pink cheeks!
Who does not like to remember the tiny moments!
The first meeting
The first few sentences spelled
The first coffee sips together
And perhaps the first fight!

Who does not like to be absent mind!
And when no one is around...
Still you are smiling like a kid
And secretly wishing and praying for someone!

Who does not like to feel that sweet pain!
For a moment one wonders
Is being kid-like normal or
Normal is to behave insane!

Who does not like to get
Butterflies when the name is said!
And last page scribbling of the name,
Who does not like the echo of voice!
The vibration of tone..
And those cutie pie pet names
And yet when not a single word whispered..
Reading those eyes!
Who just do not like!

Who does not like to be asked if food is eaten!
Or a reminder to drive slow
Or to check things before you forgot,
Who does not like to be simply told!
To sleep early
And be served in the morning
With tea and red rose!

Who does not like to be the one!
The one special
A pretty face!
Complex be the situation or feeling
Who does not like
That unconditional support!

Who does not like to be adored!
Where admiration is far more gratifying than anything!
Earnest expressions of affection
Who does not like flatter lines in the crowd!
Talking of the fascinations!

Who does not like to cry!
Cry out all stress and sniff
When there is a shoulder
Strong and concerned
Bow the head
Tears just roll-down
All bitter thoughts just rinse!

Who does not like those restless nights!
Those captivating thoughts
The excitement to see a new day
Those silly hiccups
Those secret plans to set a simple day as special
Who does not like to be surprised in anyway!

Who does not like those mushy talks!
Those flying kisses from the distance
And those cuddle pose
Those warm arms
Holding hands!
Mould the fondness
Cup the face!
Where you forget life’s all odd
Who does not like those silly short messages on phone!
Those teasing miss calls
And those in simple message cracking code!

Who does not like to be treasured!
Just as the plants needs light, heat and water
We also need to be deeply cared..
We also want to be madly pampered..
Every day and every minute
Who does not like to be liked!
Who does not wish to be cherished!
Delicately touched
Passionately hugged
And perhaps who does not like to be genuinely loved!!
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02 February, 2011

55 fiction - sync vibes and thoughts

This post is published as an entry for the KING AND QUEEN OF 55F CONTEST – The first ever unique, challenge for the coveted title in micro fiction category.
To catch the crowning moments and also be part of future editions and other contests, visit and register at Cafe GingerChai

Rules of the contest:
  • One have to write a set of three 55F.
  • The first two sets should be a story on its own.
  • The two stories should climax / conclude / inter-twine in the third set of 55F.
  • The story could be of any genre i.e, love, crime, mystery or thriller etc.

55fiction: left the room
She looked in pain and her eyes were full in tears.
He looked at her and gave no sheer interest.
A long pause and silence cricking!
‘Leave the room..’ he said in anger.
She could not cope.
At ones she left the room in tears and walked off his life too without a second thought.


55fiction: passed away

She felt uneasy and weak.
She took long breaths with no comfort within.
He gave her ‘pump’ to breathe simple.
She felt hurt, heat and difficulty to stand sore.
It was not an ‘asthmatic attack’ at core but was an acute ‘heart-attack’
Perhaps latter he found, her soul passed away in pain due to ‘thought-attack’!


55fiction: comfort and conversation was missing


Still he feels her scent and presence in room.
Miss the food she often cooked.
The link of comfort was missing.
Latter in his life he missed the conversation too.
Suddenly phone rings, there are no words but deep breaths he could sense.
With broken heart he whispered, "Come back, honey! Mom left us forever!"

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