01 June, 2009

me and my Hubby - Opposites Attract

attract because
they are not really
but Complementary..
Big thoughts struck me when I brush my teeth in the morning. And today one more thought struck me —I’m completely clueless with the toothpaste froth in my mouth – my Hubby and Me – are somehow total opposite.

And then a few more thoughtful lightening in mind and my past experiences provided some perfect examples to prove :

  • By Nature
I am a dreamer and a better word to use shall be a Planner by nature. I like to plan my day, each and every activity and try to execute the plan in the best practical way. For example: If, I am going to the market, I shall make sure to make a proper list of all the things to buy and also to manage to do the things that lies in between the way.

This habit of mine helps me to manage the activities in the most effective and efficient way. Hence, above all it helps me to avoid any sort of major crises.

But the drawback of being a hardcore planner is that, the decisions to make get a bit delayed. I tend to go into micro details, doing things step by step and achieving targets.

However, my Hubby likes to be Spontaneous. The good thing about being Spontaneous is that He takes the decisions quickly. It’s indeed a good thing that despite beings spontaneous he takes quick and right decisions.

Having said all that, I being a minute to minute planner and He being a Spontaneous choose the best possible way to tackle/manage the issues.
Opposits Attracts

  • Food Habits
He loves to eat food in “Thali” style. Thali means there is a huge dish in which the main course with many accompaniments is served. So one gets a chance to enjoy tasting many and different flavors in food.

But when it comes to me, I prefer eating one main course with the bread. The accompaniment with the main course does not tempt me. So in a way I am very specific about what I am eating.

Again, despite having different choices in food, we enjoy eating. Trying different cuisines and above all cooking for each other different dishes. Yes! You read right, He cooks for me, infact he is definitely a better cook than me.
  • Life-Style
I follow perfection. I keep my things, clothes etc in a very synchronize way.
But My hubby is a bit untidy. He keeps things wherever he gets space. Well then I know that almost all guys/bachelors have a natural-born tendency to be a bit untidy, hence I do sometimes ignore his habit. But then it doesn't mean his habit doesn't bug me and I'm sure I bug him well with my perfection too.

Right BalanceHappy Marriage is the Practical adjustments creating a healthy equilibrium between two people thought.
One has to understand that in today’s era a guy and the girl will have to help each other to carry the works efficiently. Gone are the days when the differentiation between the responsibilities of the man and woman were made.

I have never understood the concept of compromise. I have felt this strongly that Compromise means doing the thing with no personal interest and because one has left no choices. So, I find to compromise a very negative act to do. Therefore, I shall personally never follow or suggest anybody to Compromise in life, Marriage or any relationship. I believe in Accepting willinglyrather than to compromise. One must respect and willingly accept the choices their soul mate makes. Taking decisions or Accepting the one, the decisions must make a person Happy and Satisfied.

The couple has to know the fact that marriage shall bring many changes to their simple living. They have to find a balance of their roles and responsibilities between economical, social and personal perspective.

For a girl, changes like moving to a new place, shall add new family members and new relatives are some of the prime changes to accept willingly. She will have to soon after the marriage, learn new steps and ways to carry on the things. So, here Adapting is the main key to all the puzzles. Adapting to new environment and people must be their priority after marriage.
They will have to catch the rhythm, follow each beat and match steps with each other and the family.

And when one shouts, other has to be silent and let the negative energy diffuses. Silence probably at that point means being Strong enough to handle the situation.
Relationship enriches when there is a time to Interact, Listenand Learn each other.
Indeed, some of the Greatest philosophies can be learnt but only if married. It is a through learning process. You learn from each other’s strengths. And hide the weakness of each other with your complementary strengths.

Just keep your honesty intact and you will find happiness. A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' come together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.

So the question arise again, Do opposites really attract? Well, I believed so. But at the end of the post I realized we are not as opposite as I thought we were. It’s interesting to explore that we having not much in common, found some common way to perform the best in us.
In science the Law of attraction works on the basis of Opposites Attracts.
Like a great Chinese symbol Yin-Yang. Like Yin-Yang, we have opposing qualities in phenomena. We transform each other. Also, like Yin Yang we create balance, a dynamic equilibrium. So until both energies do not vibrate in harmony with the other they will not be attracted to each other.

Indeed, the attraction lies in the opposing forces which are interconnected and interdependent in the natural world, giving rise to each other in turn.
Now, I have started trusting in being a bit spontaneous. .I don’t need a plan-sheet to have fun. Amazingly,my hubby have also understood, in leading a good life with a good life-style, so he takes care not to keep wet towel on bed. These are simple things, sometimes might sound silly or serious. It’s absolutely your choice how you wanna handle the big and little things in Life. Be open to your thoughts. Accept the ideas provided by your partner and find the mutual best steps to be taken.

Never forget to add a little humor, humanity and hope to your humming thoughts. Being opposite is fine because you fill up the each other’s blanks. As long as you can respect and pay interests to each other’s differences, it is a beautiful thing.
I’m glad that, I and my hubby are opposite and very much complementary to each other. We have more options and choices to make out of the issue. And hence well goes the saying that When a wife has a good husband it is easily seen in her face”.


  1. I completely love this post and very well written girl..

    If both are the same it can be really boring and thaz why opposites attract.

    Hmm is it ur wedding anniversary post?

    “When a wife has a good husband it is easily seen in her face”.
    -Very true:)))

  2. Hiiii Rachana

    i loved ur post about ur beautiful realtionshipppppp "Marriage". All you hav written about it is true dear. U know i beleive ki marriage mein love+ Trust+ understanding hona bohut jaruri hai and ya shaadi jaise beautiful realtionship mein hamesha kuch na kuch aisa karte rehna chahiye jisse shaadi aur bhi beautifullllllll hoti jai. Chote chote pyaar ke lamhe iss relrtionship ko aur bhi strong karti hai. ANd yes hamein hamesha kuch bhi karke apne partner ko yeh feel karate rehna chahiye ki HE/SHE is the most beautifulll, special & best person of his/her life. OKK anywaz wish u a happy married life enjoy life and i wil pray to god that tumahri shaadi dino din itni strong se strong ho jai so that no wind, cyclone, disaster can do nothing harm to ur realtionship. OK take care sweety and u know tera blog padke mujhe bhi shaadi karne ko mann kar raha hai:)

  3. Suparna

    I do agree with u dear. It's realy an amazing feeling that we are opposite but still we love 2 b 2gether in every turn of our life.We fight, we love, we understand, we care , we compromise.All things can happen in a marriage, but the togetherness bind us with the thread of love, understanding and sacrifice.In my opinion marriage is a perfect gift of loving and understanding.

  4. This article will surely help me when I meet my wife :))

  5. this article will also help my wife when she meets me for our first wedding anniversary :))

  6. Hii rachna.....
    I completely agree with you....
    "its so simple to happy, but so difficult to be simple" From Bawarchi Movie..
    Yeah life is like that.. we take care of small things and bigger thing automatically gets into its conclusion. As experts say in cricket "getting back to the basics". To communicate, to love show love and affection in doing everything towards him/ her, total devotion/ commitment towards love.

    When you love somebody, love them from your heart and soul.
    Love is patient, love is kind. It has no envy, nor it boasts itself and it is never proud. It rejoices over the evil and is the truth seeker. Love protects; preserves and hopes for the positive aspect of life. Always stand steadfast in love, not fall into it. It is like the dream of your matter of affection coming true. Love can occur between two or more individuals. It bonds them and connects them in a unified link of trust, intimacy and interdependence. It enhances the relationship and comforts the soul. Love should be experienced and not just felt. The depth of love can not be measured. Look at the relationship between a mother and a child. The mother loves the child unconditionally and it can not be measured at all. A different dimension can be attained between any relationships with the magic of love. Love can be created. You just need to focus on the goodness of the other person. If this can be done easily, then you can also love easily. And remember we all have some positive aspect in us, no matter how bad our deeds maybe. And as God said "Love all"

    Love is a bliss....
    Whatever you have wrote... in your blog....
    you can write it in simple way....
    THIS IS LOVE....

  7. I'm glad that U commented and I'm following back :)

    @ Priya
    I am so glad that u liked my this post. This post is one month before my anniversary..actually could not stop myself posting it:D

    Thank u so much for following the blog and i agree with u..Marry Soon and dont forget to invite me:)

    U got married recently and no wonder,U have turned a philosopher like me ;)
    Glad u visited my blog..

    I'm glad this post shall help u in future...But man when r u marrying!!

    Very enchanting comment. U have understood is so well. Boy! U take it as command or request..START your Blog at ones :)


    Hi,i really agree with u,“When a wife has a good husband it is easily seen in her face”.If you love someone ,u have to with all your heart. Accept each other with our own merits & demerits. I and my hubby are opposite like u. We too have more options and choices to make out of the issue. We tend to solve our problems together respecting each others view.
    Julie ,Guwahti


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