This is a series of love.
~ For I don’t hate-love-story!
IIt felt like I drove all night.
It was a long dark foggy night which felt like it had no end to it.
As I reached my apartment building, at the parking lot, I kept waiting for a while to get down from the car. I was so numb about the whole situation. I sat and watched my chunks of thoughts fleet, all the while I wondered what it could all mean or everything I thought was nothing at all. How could I find her and lose her same time like a little history repeats in itself, I marveled!
After reaching home, I opened the door, it felt bit drained.
But I loved that feeling of instant, when she stared at me from across the crowd. It was her aura and I was sinking, soaking and swimming into it. I was not drowning into it, I only filling up my lungs with little breath left around with strange salt water. It was not possible for me to come out of that feeling. Feeling that was so much familiar and full of affection.
But my head was spinning, trying hard to sort out things and every time I consider more it felt like there was no way out of this whirlpool of weird thoughts. As I collapsed exhausted on the bed in the same clothes, without caring to untie the shoes too, unexpectedly there was a flashback of her only birthday together celebrated. I took her to her favourite restaurant, had great food, her favourite ice-cream and gave her lovely bracelet as a birthday present. She looked simple and sweet as ever. Our feeling became less like friends and more like love. We even danced and I tried doing all my modest bits only to make her day perfect, beautiful and memorable. While dancing, gazing into her eyes, I had embraced her like never before. And for the first time I kissed her on the forehead and slowly placed a small soft kiss on her sweet lips.
But she knew the unrevealed truth, when she knew it was love, it fed her with fear, she avoided confronting it. She was a child then, I don’t blame her actually, and it was her 19th birthday. Did she doubt on my love; I doubt that, because as far as I knew her, she understood me more than anyone has ever made efforts to know me. Honestly, somewhere her implicit feelings for me were never hidden from me.
All the things she did to me over the past, blended with curiosity. And today nothing matters much. I forgive you dear. And perhaps I truly wonder if she had still giving me, one more chance I have been longing.
‘Please don’t run away now, my mate!’ I pleaded wordlessly in my heart.
Almost chocked with tears, I thought, sometimes it’s better to stay in dark and not seek what shouldn’t be found.
It was such an exhausting day; I fell asleep immediately and was thankful for a dreamless sleep. But the fact was even when the nightmares came, the memory of that first soft kiss seemed to chase them all away giving me sudden goose bumps. Suddenly the mobile rang with the vibration on.
The mobile was still in my pocket. I got up with uneasiness. Took out the mobile from my trouser pocket and saw the unknown number. It was still a senseless mid-night. Almost before the last ring I picked up the call.
‘Hello!’ I said in the clearing my throat.
‘Yes, who is it?’ I asked suspiciously.
‘Umm...!’ I suddenly exclaimed recounting her sweet voice.
‘Yes’ she replied almost breaking down.
‘What’s wrong?’ I asked with all my concerns.
‘I .... I was wondering if you can come and pick up me from here...’ She said in a very broken embarrassed voice.
‘Where are you right now?’ I asked her, while searching the keys of my car in the room.
‘I’m outside the party hall, in the garden’ she said.
‘I’ll be there as soon as I can, you don’t move from there and please don’t cry..’ I said as I hung up the call, worried for her.
My heart was aching; I was so tensed for her.
While driving to her, numerous weird thoughts came into my mind. I abruptly tried making a call again to her, but her number was unknown, so couldn't dial back to her. It wasn’t easy for me to focus. My mind was swinging frantically from one bad thought to other. You know how world is, how the night was, and for God sake she is a little tender baby for me still.
The dust had settled, the tide of time had stopped washing the shore, all I was left with remains of her, I cannot afford to lose this footprint of time this moment. I was driving really fast, clearing the mist covering on the road with a silent longing and an anxiety to reach to her as early as possible.
As I was getting closer to her, I prayed, I just wished, I only hoped everything was fine with her.
...Continue to READ Part-6